http://elizabethwideopenspaces.wordpress.com/
Please comment and subscribe as you wish!
Saturday, June 18, 2011
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Want to get lunch (with my five hundred friends)?
Living in the 21st century has its perks, the potential for social connectivity being one of the biggest. In just a few seconds I can connect with anyone from my neighbor down the street to my college roomate in California to my best friend living in Spain. Not only that, but we can connect with their friends and their friends, knowing people on Facebook whom we've never met, but have some infinitesimal connection with through an acquaintance we talked to once.
An amazing feat-yes. But it has its drawbacks. I'm thinking of all those times I've met a friend for tea and found myself talking to his forehead because whoever posted on facebook or sent him that text about the movie later just couldn't wait.
It's true that our cellphones and Ipads make it easier for colleagues, friends, and family to contact us. And with availability comes dependability. It's become harder and harder to make the excuse "So sorry, I missed your call," when practically everyone is glued to their phone. When a person doesn't pick up, it's not only a point of frustration, but also of abandonment. Why didn't he pick up, we wonder. He has his phone, what could be more important? Those complaints are justifiable with certain people-a best friend, perhaps, a boss, or a parent.
It worries me, though, what this does to our social lives. When half of my time spent with a friend is spent on my cellphone, am I really showing that I care for him, or am I showing that there are more interesting people out there I'd rather talk to? I'd say it's the latter. The continuous vibrations from the phone sitting on the dinner table breaks up the flow of conversation. Instead of focusing on the flesh and blood person before us, our attentions are turned to the five hundred virtual people posting online.
With the understanding that this might appear outdated to many modern gurus of the day, I'd suggest we turn off our cellphones when we go grab lunch. Let's share a meal with the people sitting next to us, not the people in our pocket.
An amazing feat-yes. But it has its drawbacks. I'm thinking of all those times I've met a friend for tea and found myself talking to his forehead because whoever posted on facebook or sent him that text about the movie later just couldn't wait.
It's true that our cellphones and Ipads make it easier for colleagues, friends, and family to contact us. And with availability comes dependability. It's become harder and harder to make the excuse "So sorry, I missed your call," when practically everyone is glued to their phone. When a person doesn't pick up, it's not only a point of frustration, but also of abandonment. Why didn't he pick up, we wonder. He has his phone, what could be more important? Those complaints are justifiable with certain people-a best friend, perhaps, a boss, or a parent.
It worries me, though, what this does to our social lives. When half of my time spent with a friend is spent on my cellphone, am I really showing that I care for him, or am I showing that there are more interesting people out there I'd rather talk to? I'd say it's the latter. The continuous vibrations from the phone sitting on the dinner table breaks up the flow of conversation. Instead of focusing on the flesh and blood person before us, our attentions are turned to the five hundred virtual people posting online.
With the understanding that this might appear outdated to many modern gurus of the day, I'd suggest we turn off our cellphones when we go grab lunch. Let's share a meal with the people sitting next to us, not the people in our pocket.
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
The Philosophy of Lip Rings
I like to mark the beginning of each new chapter in my life with a visible representation. In the past it usually has had something to do with my hair-cut it off or die it blue. Once I tried to completely redo my wardrobe (though that became way too expensive way too fast). This past January I did something totally unexpected by any of my friends and family (when I texted the picture most of the responses I got were "WHAT?").
I pierced my lip. Don't worry, nothing big. Just a monroe piercing, a tiny silver ball just above the right side of my lip. I find it classy and fun, though some would disagree.
In fact, that's exactly what I've noticed over the past few months... Different people view my monroe piercing in different ways.
But more than that, I've begun to realize that the different perspectives actually change the significance of the piercing.
For example, a lot of people found my piercing edgy and exotic. In getting it, I was being adventurous and brave. To them I was an interesting person whom they wanted to get to know. Funny enough, I've actually made a lot of friends with people who've introduced themselves by complementing me on my monroe.
In other circles, though, it was just the opposite. Facial piercings were trashy and weird. In getting it, I was rebelling and acting immature.
Though their thoughts didn't correspond with how I viewed the piercing, in their believing it was rebellious the act became rebellious.
What I'm getting at here is that no single person defines the meaning of an action. No matter how the actor views the action, the opinions of those people around him also define the meaning of the action.
As soon as I knew that a group of people near me viewed the piercing as rebellious, that knowledge affected my actions. It was a piece of information I knew and could not forget. Thus, no matter if I wanted other's opinions to affect my decisions, they did. If I kept the piercing, I rebelled against their understanding of correct appearances, whether I wanted to be a rebel or not. If I took it out, I was a conformist, whether I wanted to be or not.
Being a rebel depends on one's motive, but it also depends on the circumstances. It would be impossible for my piercing to be rebelious around the people who thought it was cool, but around the people who thought it strange, my piercing could be nothing but rebellious.
How a group of people or a person (it doesn't need to be a majority) perceives your actions plays a part in determining the significance of those actions. If something is scandalous to a lot of people, but not to you, it's still scandalous on some level. If something is prudish to a lot of people, but not to you, it's still prudish on some level.
The opinions of people matter because they shape the reality we live in (whether we want them to or not, and whether they shape it in the right way or not). This gives a whole other meaning to the expression "choose your friends wisely."
I pierced my lip. Don't worry, nothing big. Just a monroe piercing, a tiny silver ball just above the right side of my lip. I find it classy and fun, though some would disagree.
In fact, that's exactly what I've noticed over the past few months... Different people view my monroe piercing in different ways.
But more than that, I've begun to realize that the different perspectives actually change the significance of the piercing.
For example, a lot of people found my piercing edgy and exotic. In getting it, I was being adventurous and brave. To them I was an interesting person whom they wanted to get to know. Funny enough, I've actually made a lot of friends with people who've introduced themselves by complementing me on my monroe.
In other circles, though, it was just the opposite. Facial piercings were trashy and weird. In getting it, I was rebelling and acting immature.
Though their thoughts didn't correspond with how I viewed the piercing, in their believing it was rebellious the act became rebellious.
What I'm getting at here is that no single person defines the meaning of an action. No matter how the actor views the action, the opinions of those people around him also define the meaning of the action.
As soon as I knew that a group of people near me viewed the piercing as rebellious, that knowledge affected my actions. It was a piece of information I knew and could not forget. Thus, no matter if I wanted other's opinions to affect my decisions, they did. If I kept the piercing, I rebelled against their understanding of correct appearances, whether I wanted to be a rebel or not. If I took it out, I was a conformist, whether I wanted to be or not.
Being a rebel depends on one's motive, but it also depends on the circumstances. It would be impossible for my piercing to be rebelious around the people who thought it was cool, but around the people who thought it strange, my piercing could be nothing but rebellious.
How a group of people or a person (it doesn't need to be a majority) perceives your actions plays a part in determining the significance of those actions. If something is scandalous to a lot of people, but not to you, it's still scandalous on some level. If something is prudish to a lot of people, but not to you, it's still prudish on some level.
The opinions of people matter because they shape the reality we live in (whether we want them to or not, and whether they shape it in the right way or not). This gives a whole other meaning to the expression "choose your friends wisely."
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)